About Face

Picking up the pieces from an unrealized goal is always a little rough. I’m very goal oriented. Without a goal I flounder. Goals help me focus, keep me on a familiar road and give me something to look forward to.

Focus is key. Having something to focus on keeps my mind occupied enough to not let anxiety take hold. Anxiety is my nemesis. I work very hard to avoid it.

Part of the problem I have at present is I really can’t make plans. I have an obstacle with an unknowable timeline. But despite that obstacle one phrase comes to mind. “Stay on target,”

I had to ask myself why I made the decisions I made, and if I would make the same decisions again. In doing this, I remembered my long term goals and motivations.

So now the mantra of the day is,”Stay On Target.”

I’m leaving the nightmare behind and recalling my dreams. The path isn’t entirely clear. but I have a general direction to face myself.

“I know I want to go that way,” she gestures off vaguely.

The fortitude real or not, is comforting, the determination familiar. The foolhardiness dances just along the side of my periphery. Soon, I will begin to visualize again, and then I can begin to plan.

And it’s ok, despite being derailed and disappointed. It’s ok despite the changes in the industry. It’s ok that we’re in year three of a pandemic and seemingly on the cusp of yet another war.

“Stay On Target”

Published by Clarisa

Traveler, Writer, Cook, Mariner, Veteran

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