COVID changed a lot of things. It forced the world to do a hard stop, giving most of us a chance to ponder our choices.
For service workers, especially cooks, it was a chance to take a hard look at their lifestyles and quality of life. Many didn’t like what what they saw and left the industry, so now there is a shortage of cooks industry wide.
I took a hard look at some things too. For one, I pondered faith. I was baptized Catholic, and even went to Catholic high school, but life took me in a different direction and I never completed the Sacraments for Confirmation.
For a large portion of my adult life I was agnostic. I based my belief in the Universe and somewhat in fatalism. “If It’s meant to be in the Universe…” is what I would muse (read: pray).
At some point I think I realized I simply changed the name of God in my mind. I continued to live by the tenants of “Do Unto Others,” and “Love Thy Neighbor,” but I wasn’t practicing the Sacraments. I missed them.
To be honest, being away from the Catholic Church always felt like unfinished business. I missed the rituals the most. But because so many negative things had come from the Church and religion in general, I felt there was no path for me to return.
The isolation of the shutdown and of my location in Rural Saskatchewan somehow opened that path. I was skeptical at best, but went anyway, and ultimately decided to become Confirmed.
I’m still skeptical at times. (Even Mother Theresa doubted the existence of God.) I don’t 100% agree with everything the Church does or has done. But I enjoy celebrating Mass where I’m reminded that it’s ok to come as you are.
Beyond Clarity 